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lost dreams

My name is MaS,
and i have yet to grow,
from my adolescent state,
to wat many call as a mature adult,
though i am no longer a teen by age,
thy shall act like a kid,
but only for a certain time,
or risk facing trouble thats shit,
im no longer a kid,
im no longer a teen,
but could i still act as one,
for the fun of it.

Life, is shit, and shit is life, and this is how h eruns his life. Life is unfair and so is he, he harden his soul to create a emotionless spree. He is soo lame he is soo quiet, but that is how he is. He is all vulgar and also disgusting, but he is who he is and not like other. He holds a principle, based on his soul, its always changing with the flow of time. The growth is there but it isn't obvious because the life he's in is so damn troublesome. He may seem all nice, he may seem like a pushover, but never try his limit or you'll face his anger. His life is tough, and he knows others too have it tough, but everyone is different and they should never be compared. Comparison kill his spirit, comparison killed his mind, it is as though it is no more his but rather it is others. He is disturbingly disturbed and sometimes extremely the extreme, but this is rare as its a rare phenomenon. He is nothing but a fool indeed, living thru this life with all he got. His life seems awful, but it is to him alone, he wouldn't understand others as how others wouldn't understand him. Thank you so much for reading this shit, as it means alot for his stuff to be read.


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Monday, July 25, 2005

life is a killer ... n soo is uni .... n soo is the learning

peace u all ..... everyone peace ... its just the 1st day of uni .... n im tired like shit ..... dam it ... how to cope for the rest of the sem .... well .... i guess i'll manage sumhow .... but now .... seems like ppl r enjoying themselves in wat they r studying .... good for u .... n to others .... just enjoy ur life .... with ur studies ..... hahahaha ... well well ...... as usual .... all lectures in VU r compulsory ...... n so r the tutorials ..... but unfortunately ..... im trying to be a hero .... sign up for tutes ..... not the same with the gang .... amirul, tracy, n fendi they all la ...... cos they were cutting queue ..... unlike me .... becoming good boy ..... didnt cut queue ... but queue up like a total absolute fool ..... well ..... my timetable still sucks ..... cant be helped ..... but arranging for the livelihood for this coming sem ..... seriously .... gotta spend less .... n gotta save more .... so dat can get a nice coat for myself ... since i never had 1 ..... yes i know im stupid in the fashion sense .... i blame myself for dat .... but dun worry ...... for now .... im just lacking money ... or else .... i wanna dress up nicely ...... but a style dat has been in my mind .... but rather tedious work to dress up such way ..... hahahahaha

alrite ... enuf stupid stuff .... wanna say ..... hell .... im sooo gonna suffer through hell ..... well wat can do ... who asked me to be a hero ..... well .. hopefully .... this time around .... i can break the ice with other ppl .... including indonesians ..... n maybe make new frens ...... but most probably highly unlikely ... since all has their own click's ..... meaning their own gang who they talk to .... well .... maybe jsut get to know them ... as acquaintances .... well ..... freaking tired .. need sleep .... though im fucking hungry .... i know im filled with vulgar words .... n is considered a very perverted bastard .... so u can bang me all u wan ....

cant really update u much ... dats all ... needs sleep .... dying .... dying ...... dead _____________________________________ flatlined ... dead on bed

posted by Elwyn at 10:56 PM

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