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lost dreams

My name is MaS,
and i have yet to grow,
from my adolescent state,
to wat many call as a mature adult,
though i am no longer a teen by age,
thy shall act like a kid,
but only for a certain time,
or risk facing trouble thats shit,
im no longer a kid,
im no longer a teen,
but could i still act as one,
for the fun of it.

Life, is shit, and shit is life, and this is how h eruns his life. Life is unfair and so is he, he harden his soul to create a emotionless spree. He is soo lame he is soo quiet, but that is how he is. He is all vulgar and also disgusting, but he is who he is and not like other. He holds a principle, based on his soul, its always changing with the flow of time. The growth is there but it isn't obvious because the life he's in is so damn troublesome. He may seem all nice, he may seem like a pushover, but never try his limit or you'll face his anger. His life is tough, and he knows others too have it tough, but everyone is different and they should never be compared. Comparison kill his spirit, comparison killed his mind, it is as though it is no more his but rather it is others. He is disturbingly disturbed and sometimes extremely the extreme, but this is rare as its a rare phenomenon. He is nothing but a fool indeed, living thru this life with all he got. His life seems awful, but it is to him alone, he wouldn't understand others as how others wouldn't understand him. Thank you so much for reading this shit, as it means alot for his stuff to be read.


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Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Good at 1st, Bad at last. AARRGGHHHHH!!!!!

heyya, just wanna blog about my bad gambling luck. it was good for the 1st 2 days before it went down a spiral. gone with the wind. indeed. haihz, plus with the big amount of cousins around with me. i lost quite a huge amount of money. seriously a great lost. i dunno why such a great lost. haihz. and when i tried to go out the last round with a big amount of money as my last bet, i had to pay triple. omg. its not a good thing here. lost quite alot of money there. n not forgetting having to pay for some of my cousin's things like the ice skating. like 7 of them went for skating, luckily i hae another cousin to pay for half of it. but still it cost more than RM200. my other cousin paid RM100, while i had to pay the rest. seriously, financially, oohhh its bad bad bad. plus, there is an uncle of mine who borrowed my phone instead of his own children's phone to call back to sabah. wat a bastard man. and its not for a short while. it was for quite sometime. wow, boy was i really pissed, and yet he can smile, n laugh, reallly bloody annoying.

haihz, i also had to pay for the pizza, which came up to a total of RM60 which my aunt said she would pay me back for, but still havent paid me yet. aarrrgggghhhhhhh

really losing the mood. haihz.

should i be straight forward and ask for the money that they owe or just keep quite. since they are relatives/family. dunno la......

all i can say all those above would total up to a near or maybe more than RM500.

haihz. its just makes my heart unhappy, to just have all of this happen to me.

not forgetting i have to become driver for soooo many, drive and bring them around. haihz. im tired, since i have to sleep in the hall for 3 nights straight already. and i couldnt get enuf of good sleep, and also in this freaking hot weather. its really getting to me.

well dats about it, this is my rants for CNY..........

posted by Elwyn at 4:10 PM

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