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lost dreams

My name is MaS,
and i have yet to grow,
from my adolescent state,
to wat many call as a mature adult,
though i am no longer a teen by age,
thy shall act like a kid,
but only for a certain time,
or risk facing trouble thats shit,
im no longer a kid,
im no longer a teen,
but could i still act as one,
for the fun of it.

Life, is shit, and shit is life, and this is how h eruns his life. Life is unfair and so is he, he harden his soul to create a emotionless spree. He is soo lame he is soo quiet, but that is how he is. He is all vulgar and also disgusting, but he is who he is and not like other. He holds a principle, based on his soul, its always changing with the flow of time. The growth is there but it isn't obvious because the life he's in is so damn troublesome. He may seem all nice, he may seem like a pushover, but never try his limit or you'll face his anger. His life is tough, and he knows others too have it tough, but everyone is different and they should never be compared. Comparison kill his spirit, comparison killed his mind, it is as though it is no more his but rather it is others. He is disturbingly disturbed and sometimes extremely the extreme, but this is rare as its a rare phenomenon. He is nothing but a fool indeed, living thru this life with all he got. His life seems awful, but it is to him alone, he wouldn't understand others as how others wouldn't understand him. Thank you so much for reading this shit, as it means alot for his stuff to be read.


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Tuesday, April 05, 2005

i feel this week just aint my week .....

well ... it all started with my broken window ..... u can look dat up in my last post ..... n then its my law manual book .... where i do the exercises in .... n due this thursday ... went missing .... had to get a new 1 today ... my theory was totally off ...... die le ..... haihz ..... dam sad ... then now my car battery dead .... gotta get a new 1 ...... this week is really aint my week ......

n as for today .... on the way back home ... i was struggling to maintain my car from dying .... by reving (is dat how to spell it ??? ) the engine ....... god dam it .... as soon as i slows down .... the battery starts to lose its power .... n it almost wanted to die ..... really dam sad ...... shit le .... then .... haiya .... 2 many things has happen .....

n everytime .... there would be a remedy around ..... but .... always at a cost ..... dat is time .... n $$$$$$$$ ...... dam sad ... really losing much of my mood .... nothing is going well for me this week .... i hope the battery thingy is the last challenge im against .... for this week ..... i realyl hope dats all ..... but i have a feeling .... there is sumthing bigger installed for me ...... hopefully .... my feelings r wrong .... which is always wrong ..... haihz ... n then there was suppose to be a post about my law manual book yesterday ... but it wasnt able to load at all .... really screwed up le ... haihz ... dam sad .... i know ppl would be saying ... shuddup la ... n count ur blessings ..... soo i did .,....

im thankful my car didnt die in the middle of the road ..... im thankful i got a new law manual book early ... so dat i can do it later ...... im thankful dat the service center had stock of the window ..... n im thankful my darling is there to keep me cool ... though ... she has alot of work to do ..... n im thankful there was wilson koh to lend me his car so dat i can buy the battery water from the petrol station ... or else my car would have been stuck in sunway ..... haihz .... alot of delays .... my darling wanted to sleep early so dat later she can wake up n do work early in the wee morning ..... dats her ... not me .... i cant do dat ....

soooo ...... now im reminescing the last moments which nearly got me gone balistic ... but luckily ... i have been listening to a few songs ... from beck ...... really helped me calm down .. n think properly ..... well .... i did think properly ..... n i hope all is well now ... just dat .... this things really make me not in the mood la .....

well ... dats about it la .... n not forgetting being scolded for a few other things ... which is my fault ... most obviously ...... goes to show dat im dumb ...... oohhh .. i better go wash my hand properly ... can still feel the acid on my hand ... yes the water from the car battery ..... dam corrosive ... i really can feel it eating my skin .... dam it .....

anywayz .... i just wanna sleep ... n rest early ... today has been to much for me .... i can bear it anymore .... maybe i go cut my nails 1st .... dam long ... dam irritatin ....

soo ... guys ... this is MaS reporting ... with a sadden heart ..... with a disturbed soul ..... n with a chaotic mind ...... wishing u all a great week .. so dat the rest of my week is ok .....

ehhh ... i found my last post about the manual book .... now not really pissed .. but tired .. n really wanna sleep

posted by Elwyn at 11:16 PM

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